DISSERTATION OF GETTING OLD

The other day a young person asked me how I
felt about being old. I was taken aback,
for I do not think of myself as old.

Upon seeing my reaction, she was immediately
embarrassed, but I explained that it was an
interesting question, and I would ponder it,
and let her know.

Old age, I decided, is a gift. I am now,
probably for the first time in my life, the
person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my
body! I sometime despair over my body­, the
cellulite, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes,
the jiggly thighs, and the sagging butt.

And often I am taken aback by the old lady
who lives in my mirror, but I don't agonize
over those things for long. I would never
trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life,
my loving family for less gray hair or a
flatter belly.

As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself,
and less critical of myself. I've become my
own friend. I don't chide myself for eating
that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or
for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't
need, but looks so avante garde on my patio.

I am entitled to overeat, to be messy, to be
extravagant. I have seen too many dear friends
leave this world too soon; before they
understood the great freedom that comes
with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read until
4 am, and sleep until noon? I will dance with
myself to those wonderful tunes of the 50's and
60's, and if I at the same time wish to weep
over a lost love, I will.

I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is
stretched over a bulging midriff, and will
dive into the waves with aban! don if I choose
to, despite the pitying glances from the
bikini set. They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there
again, some of life is just as well forgotten
­ and I eventually remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken.
How can your heart not break when you lose a
loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when
a beloved pet gets hit by a car?

But broken hearts are what give us strength
and understanding and compassion. A heart never
broken is pristine and sterile and will never
know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to
have my hair turn gray, and to have my youthful
laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on
my face.

So many have never laughed, and so many have
died before their hair could turn silver.

I can say "no", and mean it. I can say "yes",
and mean it.

As you get older, it is ! easier to be
positive. You care less about what other
people think. I don't question myself anymore.
I've even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old.
It has set me free. I like the person I have
become. I am not going to live forever, but
while I am still here, I will not waste time
lamenting what could have been, or worrying
about what will be.

For the first time in my life, I don't have to
have a reason to do the things I want to do.

And I shall eat dessert every single day ! ! !

~ Author Unknown but very wise !

Midi playing "As Time Goes By"